Two Old Codgers

How the World strikes us

Who the hell is Mary?

So far we have received sixty-three Christmas cards and it is only December 16th. By the time we reach the full blown 'festering' season we shall no doubt almost double that figure.

We get cards from the people who live next door; cards from those we see every day; from people we haven’t seen for thirty years and cards from businesses hoping take more money from us in the coming year. Then there are the cards which Doreen opens with a cry of Horror “This is from Esme and Norman and we haven’t sent them one!”. This causes instant panic and a search for an unused card we can post first class within the next hour.

Worst of all are the cards where you don’t recognise the handwriting and you have no idea who sent it. For instance we have six cards which, after the brief Christmas message, are simply signed ‘Mary’. At a quick count we know seventeen people called Mary, three of whom should have received a Christmas card from us.

It takes some prolonged, quiet arguing to persuade the good lady that it is not a good idea to send all seventeen a Christmas card. Firstly there is the expense, an argument which cuts no ice at all, then there is the distress we are going to cause seventeen women called Mary (The emotional argument is often successful) Seventeen bewildered and panic stricken Marys will have to dash out and buy us a Christmas card and search through ancient address books to try to find us. “There is enough unhappiness at Christmas without us adding to it” I say. This is reluctantly accepted with the rider “But we must make sure we send them all one next year”.

So here is a little plea to six Marys, three Joans and two Johns. I am sure you know who you are but we have no idea which of our acquaintances, friends or relations is the author of these cards. Please, please next year give us a clue. Something quite simple like your surname or more subtle such as ‘From Mary (The one with halitosis)’ or ‘From John (I will return your lawnmower before next Christmas)’.

The final suggestion and one I would happily join you in is “Next year we promise we will stop sending Christmas cards and give the money to the tortoise protection society”

Comment from John on King Island

The yearly plethora of Christmas cards both inwards and outwards it seems, is rapidly diminishing, and I reckon I know why.
The Internet -  emails to be precise. Recipients get them up to a month before Christmas; some just say the usual Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, others attach a couple of pages of size 8 font expounding what's been going on in their lives for the past twelve months including their last haircut and presuming of course that people care.

Then there's the colourful - and musical ecards which the sender can purchase and send to 1000 or so people, they can be very entertaining.
But all Christmas wishes sent electronically have one thing in common: read - delete, read - delete, read - delete! 
When a family member or a friend takes the time to buy a card, writes some caring words inside its cover, purchases a stamp and goes to the trouble of posting it, then you know that they are really thinking of you. A hand written card containing some loving thoughts can emanate a warmth which is reflected every time one sees it sitting proudly on the mantelpiece. 
So having said that, Rhonda and I would like to electronically & hypocritically wish you a Merry Christmas´╗┐ and the best for 2019. ´╗┐

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