Two Old Codgers

How the World strikes us

DAY DREAMS
I suspect we all have day dreams, one way or another. Maybe we dream of
Lottery win
getting our golf handicap down, getting a couple of inches off our waist, recovering a full head of hair or persuading the wife that she really would enjoy a two seater sports car instead of the Fiesta. These days many would day dream of winning the lottery. For me the win would not mean a bigger house or the joy of a tropical cruise, the very thought of being with several thousand other passengers is enough to turn my day dream into a nightmare. No, at my age I usually start fantasising about how I would distribute my new found wealth - after I had bought the two seater sports car, of course.
Sports car


First of all I have to dream "How much". I assure myself that I really don't want umpteen million pounds. Just think of the worry! No, a couple of hundred thousand would be fine. Hang on a minute though! I would have to give hand outs to children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. We'd better make that a straight million.

Would friends expect to be treated? The news is bound to get out "That miserable old git at number 22 has won the lottery!". Perhaps make it two million so I could be really generous. Then I start to worry about if they would have to pay tax on what I gave them. How much would it be, I have a feeling it's 40%! I think I had better add an other million or two just to be on the safe side.

I can almost hear the comments "All that money and the miserable sod only
Doffing
gave us £20K!" or "He must be barmy handing it out like that, I think he is just trying to buy friends"; "He thinks he's Lord of the manor now, Probably expects you to doff your hat when you pass him in the street".

Another thought drops in to ruin the dream. Suppose I die before I can give it away, that would mean hideous death duties.

Let's push that dream to one side and find another, more sunny, day dream. This is a real conversation I had with an old friend several years ago: Old friend "I'm thinking of writing a novel" Me "Oh, what's it about?" Old friend "No idea, I'm only thinking about it". Needless to say it never happened.
Once upon a time
I could write a book or I would if I could think of a subject. How about a sort of 007 thriller? but then it would be all imagination. I am more of a "What if it all goes wrong? type" person rather than jumping in to put things right.

Books on gardening are always popular but as someone who can't tell a geranium from a dalmatian that might be a non starter. An autobiography! All the material is there in my head. As usual, I start looking at the snags. Whenever I start recounting anecdotes from my past, friends or family suddenly look as though they are in need of cataract operations, their eyes lose their brightness. I suppose that's to do with the fact that my life hasn't been very exciting, thank goodness, excitement usually means trouble for someone like me.

I think I'll stick to Walter Mitty style daydreams where I can have all the excitement and glory without stepping outside my comfort zone, flying a Spitfire, climbing Everest or being a lion tamer.

So, clear off and do your own day dreaming, I am going racing and I'm going to overtake Lewis Hamilton on the next bend. Must remember to put on my seat belt.

Overtake


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